The Good Guy (A Play)

The Good Guy is a play that I wrote in high school (Homestead High, in the picture), inspired by my friendship with a developmentally challenged (what we used to call “mentally retarded”) boy named John Emanuel. In recent years I updated it, only to find (when I was through) that over 80% of the play was what I had originally written. John and myself are represented by the characters of George and Younger Henry (there is also an older version of the character) in the play, and in this excerpt they are about to meet.


(Lights come up full onstage, as the spotlight on George fades out, and he circles around to the center of the main stage as if he’s walking to class. Hecklers 1, 2 and 3 enter; one from stage right, one from stage left, and one from center. The third one is silent, weaving in between the other actors and making faces and obscene gestures at George.)


1st Heckler: Hey guys! Look over here! Do you see what I see?

2nd Heckler: Yeah, the “Brain!” (They laugh and begin to circle George.) Why don’t we push him and see if he fights back?

(The 3rd Heckler pushes George, who tries to ignore it.)

George: Hey!

1st Heckler (Taunting voice.): Ah! He doesn’t want to fight!

George: Shut up!

2nd Heckler: Hey, listen to the Man! C’mon and fight me, “Brain!” (He clenches fists and assumes mock fight position.) C’mon and fight me!

George (Indignant.): What’s with you?

(Younger Henry enters stage right, carrying textbooks, and overhears this.)

1st Heckler: Hey! Answer this question: what is two times two?

George: Uh . . . Four.

2nd Heckler: Spell “antidisestablishmentarianism!”

George: I can’t!

Younger Henry (starting to run toward the 3 Hecklers ): Hey you! Scram!

(The 3 Hecklers, taken by surprise, run off the stage, and exit through the audience.)

Younger Henry (A bit nervous about meeting George, to himself): Well, here goes nothing! (Crosses to George.) You shouldn’t let them treat you like that!

George (Still a bit shaken): Yeah, I know. But if I try to stop them they beat me up! And I don’t like to fight people!

Younger Henry: It kind of makes you mad, doesn’t it?

George: Yeah.

Younger Henry: If they tease you like that, just ignore them. You shouldn’t have to answer their stupid questions! In fact, don’t!

George: I don’t know why they do that though!

Younger Henry: Well, you really shouldn’t even worry about it. However, I look at it this way; They call you an M.R., but look at them! Look at how they act! They’re jerks! They’re worse than anything that they can call you!

George (Not shaken anymore, but quiet and thoughtful): Yeah, I suppose so. (After a moment:) Have you ever had people treat you like that?

Younger Henry: Yeah. I guess so. At one time.

(George looks at Younger Henry.)

George: What’s your name?

Younger Henry: Henry.

George: Mines’ George. (Pause.) Do you think that you could keep a secret?

Younger Henry: Yeah.

George (backing out): No, I really shouldn’t tell you.

Younger Henry: No, I can keep a secret! Come on and tell me!

George: You might not like me after I say this.

Younger Henry: Hey, try me.

George (hesitating): Wel-ll, promise you won’t laugh at me?

Younger Henry: I promise.

George (squeezing it out in a whisper): I-I have brain damage.

Younger Henry (normal volume): So?

George (surprised): Y-you mean it does not bother you that I have brain damage?

Younger Henry: Why should it?

George: It’s just that sometimes it bothers people.

Younger Henry: It doesn’t bother me. I like all sorts of people. It doesn’t make a difference to me whether they’re like everyone else or not. In fact, I prefer people who don’t fit in with all the rest. They’re more real, you know what I mean? So, why should it matter to me if you’re brain damaged? What is important to me is that you’re a nice person. That’s what matters!

George (smiles): Cool!

(The school bell for class rings.)

George: Well, there’s the bell to go to class! I’ll see you again some other time.

Younger Henry: Yeah, nice meeting you!